Relationship Devotional: The Danger Of Talking To Everybody About Your Relationship

It’s tempting to just bear your soul with folks when you’re dealing with relationship troubles or decisions.  We all need somebody to talk to and when we’re in an emotionally stressful or difficult situation, we, both women and men, tend to reach out to people we know.
The problem is, everybody we know is not always somebody we should reach out to about our relationship.  God works through wise counselors — neutral, objective people to help guide us in the right path.  The opposite is true when we put our business in the wrong hands.  Putting your relationship business in the wrong hands is like giving your alarm code to a thief.  
Put This In Your Spirit: Proverbs 10:14 says, “The wise don’t tell everything they know, but the foolish talk too much and are ruined.” When you’re struggling or going through it in a relationship, there are three people that you should never put in your business: 1) A gossip, 2) A wounded person and, 3) Somebody who is happy if you lose. 
Likewise, you cannot put people in your relationship business who will hold on to what you should and will let go of.  You will be surprised at the number of relationships that struggle because an outside influence is holding on to something that the couple has moved on from years ago. If you’re talking to somebody who will hold a permanent grudge, dislike or negative attitude towards your mate, you’re talking to the wrong person.
When we’re hurt, we tend to gravitate, emotionally, towards whoever will make us feel good about whatever we want to feel good about. If we want to feel justified about our wrong, we tend to talk to somebody who will go along with us — even when we’re wrong.  These are poisonous conversations.
It is not abnormal or crazy to want to hear what feels good when we’re not feeling good.  The problem is, when you expose your relationship to poisonous people, you will poison your relationship.  Keep doing it and you will destroy your relationship.
Put This In Your Spirit: When we talk to wrong people about our relationship, before long, talking can turn into an unhealthy partnership with them against our relationship. Confiding in wrong people tends to create wrong, unhealthy emotional alliances that are never healthy for your relationship — it is very dangerous. Proverbs 13:20 says, “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.”
Does this mean that we shouldn’t talk to anybody?  No.  Talking is not the problem, who we’re talking to and the objective for talking can be the problem.  Are you talking to the right person for an objective, healthy purpose? Or the wrong person to agree with half the story? Let’s say you’re dating a great person but they have a flaw that you’re trying to decide if it is or should be a deal breaker.  Or let’s say you and your spouse are going through a difficult time.  The last person you need to talk to is somebody who is emotionally hurt, unsupportive of your relationship, unhappy in their relationship, happy to see you single, negative or, somebody who does not believe in the power of God.
It’s not always easy to separate the good one’s from the bad one’s.  At the very least, eliminate talking to someone who is obviously poisonous.  Another tip is to always state your objective up front when you’re talking about your relationship with someone — “I want to fix my marriage,” or, “I am trying to look objectively at my behavior/decision,” or, “I need an objective/balanced opinion,” or, “This is not about bashing my relationship or my mate or me leaving,” etc.  If you’re talking to the opposite sex, eliminate anybody who is not a friend/supporter of the relationship or who has a romantic interest (spoken or unspoken).  The devil uses open doors — put a lock on obvious foolery.
Whoever you choose to share your relationship business with, just remember that you don’t want to lose a good relationship over bad advice, or turn a temporary problem into a worse or permanent problem.  And you don’t want to make a decision based on somebody else’s hurt or ignorance. Word to the wise: Don’t give someone the ability to speak death over your love life when you’re trying to save it.
Seek God’s wisdom — don’t just read the bible but search the scripture for God’s wisdom about the problem you’re having.  It makes no sense for us to read the bible without purpose when we’re needing a answer about a specific issue.  No matter what you’re dealing with, the bible has a wisdom principle that will guide you to right thinking, right people and right answers.  If you don’t believe it, leave a comment below for a topic/issue you’re dealing with for a wisdom scripture(s) that will address it specifically.
Trust God for your destiny love decisions.  Always make the love of your life the first and the last conversation about your destiny together.  Relationships are hard enough, don’t add gasoline to the fire.
Share and be blessed.
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